- Describe the various effects of deployment on children and families.
- Describe strategies you can use to support staff before, during, and after families face deployment.
- Provide support and resources to families related to mental health and well-being.
Learn
Teach
Children experience a range of emotions, and those emotions are amplified when a family experiences a major change like deployment, death, divorce, separation, relocation, or job loss. You and your staff will likely work with children whose families experience these types of stressful events. These events mark an important time in the life of a child and their family. Each family handles stress differently, and each child will have unique needs. Nevertheless, you can use specific strategies to help staff members support children. It is your job to make sure staff members are competent and confident in their ability to support the mental health of children and youth.
First, you can introduce staff members to the Strengthening Families Protective Factors Framework. This framework is designed to prevent child abuse and neglect, but it is also an excellent way to approach your work with all families. When we strengthen families, we support the mental health of children. This framework focuses on strengths and promotes overall well-being. While it is beyond the scope of this lesson to completely explain the Protective Factors framework, you can learn more by visiting . For now, you can teach staff that there are five protective factors that they can help support in all families:
Strengthening Families Protective Factors
by the Center for the Study of Social Policy
(Figure 1)
Parental Resilience
Families are able to manage stress and bounce back from challenges.
Knowledge of Child Development and Parenting
Adults know what to expect as children grow and are able to meet their child's needs at each stage of development.
Social Connections
Families know there are people who care about them and who they can call on for help.
Concrete 勛圖厙s in Times of Need
Families can get the help they need when crises strike: food and shelter, medical and mental health services, social, legal, and educational resources.
Social and Emotional Competence of Children
Social and emotional development promotes healthy relationships with others. Children with strong relationships, who can regulate their own behavior, express their emotions, and relate to others are at lower risk of maltreatment.
You can learn more about the Protective Factors Framework by visiting
.
For the purposes of this lesson, we will focus on resilience. This is the ability to manage stress and bounce back from challenges. It is important for adults and children alike. Resilience is part of mental and emotional well-being. For children, youth, staff, and families, to thrive and flourish, it is important to help build strength for overcoming adversity.
Remember, all families face a variety of stressors and challenges. For military families, deployment is a very real stressor and one that continues to impact families long after the deployment has ended and the service member has returned home. Families stress may vary based on many different factors like the length of the deployment, whether they live on or near a military installation, whether they are Active duty, Guard, or Reserve members, and the ages of children. Make sure staff members understand that deployment is a multi-stage process. Help them understand the different emotions families might go through before, during, and after deployment.
Seven-Stage Cycle
- Stage 1 Anticipation of Departure
- Stage 2 Detachment and Withdrawal
- Stage 3 Emotional Disorganization
- Stage 4 Recovery and Stabilization
- Stage 5 Anticipation of Return
- Stage 6 Return Adjustment and Renegotiation
- Stage 7 Reintegration and Stabilization
Figure 1. Emotional Cycles of Deployment. Adapted from Morse (n.d.) and Pincus, House, Christenson, & Adler (2001).
Connect staff members with the resources they need to do their jobs. After staff or family child care providers complete the Healthy Environments course, follow up to make sure they can identify ways to support families before, during, and after deployment. Keep in mind that all families can be similarly affected by circumstances very much like deployment, such as: divorce, death or loss of a family member, relocation, incarceration, extended illness, job loss or unemployment, drug addiction, etc. Families facing these types of challenges may experience stages similar to the emotional cycles of deployment noted above. Help staff members understand that it is OK to ask for help.
Model
As a coach or trainer, you need to stay connected to the mental health needs of the children and families in your program. Make sure you know which families are experiencing deployments, divorce, relocation, grief, job loss, moving houses, adding a new family member or any other major change. Create opportunities for these families to connect with one another informally or through support networks on or near your installation. Also keep in mind that many of your staff members may experience similar life events. Listen to their concerns and help them find proactive ways to handle their stress.
Model a compassionate, problem-solving approach. Let staff members know that you are there to listen any time they need to talk. And make yourself available to families. Although they will probably build the strongest relationships with the staff members who work directly with their children, you can also be a strong supportive resource for families. Advocate for initiatives that will help your program support children, families, and staff through difficult times. For example, watch this video demonstrating how one program helps bridge the distance between deployed service members and their children.
Connecting During Deployment
Finally, remember the important role you play in modeling self-compassion and care. Model taking time to take care of your own needs. Go for a walk on your lunch break, seek professional support for issues or stress in your own life, or advocate for changes that will help you better serve your mission. For additional ideas, consider resources, articles, and calendars from the Greater Good Science Center: .
Observe
Caring for children and families experiencing extreme stress can be challenging for even the most seasoned staff member. Watch for signs that a staff member is overwhelmed or experiencing stress themselves. Be prepared to step in and offer support. Read these scenarios on the left and think about how you would respond.
Signs of Stress Scenarios
Use the menu at the left or the pager below to cycle through scenarios.
Scenario | You saw:LaShorages husband is on his first deployment. She cries every time she thinks about it. She is just not ready to talk to the kids in her class about her emotions and deployment experiences. Her feelings are too raw. |
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You Say | What you might say:LaShorage, I know youre hurting right now. Im here to talk any time you need me. Lets take it slow. It might help to remember the kids in your class have these same feelings. You can help each other learn to talk about it 色 |
Scenario | You saw:Stefan was raised to believe that boys dont cry. He was taught that it was a sign of weakness to talk about how he was feeling. He tries to understand your staff development events about mental health, but he really thinks its best not to talk about things that are difficult or emotional. He thinks everyone would feel better if they just kept busy. |
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You Say | What you might say:Stefan, I can see that you have done a lot of thinking about all of this and you care so much about the kids. We both know that everybody processes things differently. Lets talk about a few specific kids who I think might really need to talk 色 |
Scenario | You saw:Stacey has been a military wife and mother for 20 years. She has been through it all. She can comfort kids, co-workers, and families. In fact, she has a reputation for being a great person to talk to. People seek her out even after their child leaves your program. She always has a hug for everyone and makes each person feel like they are the only person in the room. |
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You Say | What you might say:
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You should also look for signs that staff members are experiencing stress. Watch this video to learn more about the signs of stress in caregivers:
Taking Care of Yourself
If you see any of these signs, recognize that a staff member might need extra support from you. Find time to talk and plan opportunities to relieve stress. Make sure the staff member takes breaks as needed and has the supports they need outside of work.
Take some time to get familiar with mental health resources in your community. The VA resource locator can help you find mental health supports for veterans and their families (). The federal government also has resources to help you get started: https://www.mentalhealth.gov/talk/parents-caregivers.
When a staff member is ready, use the Mental Health Best Practices Checklist in the Apply section to observe these competencies in staff and family child care providers. Provide feedback about what you see, and be prepared to support staff members and family child care providers as they meet the mental health needs of children and families.
Explore
It is important that you are familiar with resources related to childrens mental healthparticularly those related to deployment. Take some time to explore the resources below. Use the Mental Health Resource Sheet and write down the resources you find. Use the two-page 勛圖厙ing Children Who Are Experiencing Stress from Child Care Aware to better support staff who work with children experiencing anxiety.
Think about ways you can share these resources with staff. You can also consider how these resources could be used to support children in families experiencing other kinds of separation such as long-term illness, incarceration, or frequent travel.
Apply
It is important to continuously observe staff members performance and provide feedback on what you see. Use the Mental Health Best Practices Checklist as a focused observation tool to support staff that have completed the Healthy Environments course but may need additional support or follow up on supporting children and families experiencing stress. This checklist provides an easy way to follow up on goals set around this topic and provides specific feedback to staff members about what you observed.
The death of a parent is perhaps the most emotionally challenging event that can happen to a child. Helping Children Deal with Grief contains resources to better help staff support the mental health of children and youth as they process their grief.
Glossary
Demonstrate
Center for the Study of Social Policy. (2018). Strengthening Families Protective Factors Framework.
Gewirtz, A. H., & In Youssef, A. M. (2016). Parenting and children's resilience in military families. Switzerland: Springer International Publishing.
Ginsburg, K., & Jarlow, M. M. (2014). Building resilience in children and teens: Giving kids roots and wings (3rd ed.). American Academy of Pediatrics.
Harvard University Center for Health and Happiness. (2022). Resilience Resources.
Huebner, C. R., Section on Uniformed Services, & Committee on Psychosocial Aspects of Child and Family Health. (2019). Health and Mental Health Needs of Children in US Military Families. Pediatrics, 143(1):e20183258.
Military OneSource. (n.d.). Parenting through Deployment: The Essentials.
Morse, M. D. (n.d.). A Closer Look for Current Conditions: A Fresh Glance at the Emotional Cycles of Deployment.
Pincus, S. H., House, R., Christenson, J., & Adler, L. E. (2001). The Emotional Cycles of Deployment: A Military Family Perspective.
RAND Corporation. (2015). Family Resilience in the Military.
Seligman, M. E. (2012). Flourish: A visionary new understanding of happiness and well-being. Simon and Schuster.
Sesame Workshop. (n.d.). Sesame Street for Military Families.
U.S. Office of Child Care. (2020). Mental Health and Wellness Resources.
Zero to Three: National Center for Infants, Toddlers and Families. (n.d.). Coming Together Around Military Families.