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Bethany and Braden are 10-year-old biological twin siblings who had been in and out of foster care since they were toddlers. As pre-teens, they had been placed in the home of Derrik and Melinda Miller. The Millers were in the process of formally adopting Bethany and Braden. Neighbors and friends often joked that the Millers were “saints” for taking in pre-teens. Mr. Miller was an active-duty Service member, and the family lived on a military installation. They were, by all appearances, a respected, affluent, devout, and happy family. The family had two biological sons Caleb (age 11) and Jonah (age 15), and one adopted daughter Megan (age 2), living in the home. All of the family’s children attended the installation’s child and youth programs: the Child Development Center for Megan, the School-Age Program for Braden, Bethany, and Caleb, and the Youth Center for the older son, Jonah.

After a few weeks in the home, Derrik and Melinda called a family meeting on a Friday evening. The meeting began by sharing the rules for the family home. On the table sat 3 items: a belt, a piece of rubber hosing, and something that looked like a riding crop. Derrik told the children how important discipline was in their family. “I know you two have been on your own a lot and with lots of different families. It’s different here. Here we expect obedience.” He showed each of the three items to the children and explained how and when they might expect to receive a beating with each item. When Braden rolled his eyes, Derrik said, “That is exactly what I am talking about.” He forced Braden to stand up and receive a beating with the belt. Melinda told the children that the parents and older siblings would help “train the children how to behave.” She handed the piece of rubber tubing to their 11-year-old biological son. “Caleb will help you learn. Bethany, it was not ok for you to refuse to eat your dinner tonight. I cooked that dinner for you, and you will be respectful at meals. There will be no food or drink until you learn to eat what’s given to you. You can try again at dinner tomorrow night. Until then, Caleb will make sure you do not go into the kitchen or drink out of the sinks. Tomorrow night you will sit at the table. You will say, “Please,” and “Thank you, ma’am,” and you will eat everything on your plate. Is that clear?”

By lunchtime the next day, Bethany was very hungry. Braden tried to sneak some food to her. Caleb saw the whole thing. While his parents watched, Caleb beat Braden so badly that he suffered a broken bone. When Derrik heard Braden crying, Derrik just said, “I’m disappointed you disobeyed. You’ll heal. I don’t want to see you crying or hear another thing about it.” Braden never saw a doctor for his injuries.

Later that night, Melinda made a post on her parenting blog. On it she wrote about the need for obedience and peace in the home. She wrote about how spanking a child can “bring peace” and “help set the boundaries that help the child know they are loved.” She wrote about helping pre-teens “overcome their evil selves” and “learn to be a family.”

All of the Miller’s children attended the same public school system. They also attended the school-age and youth programs on the installation. Bethany and Braden often got in trouble for their behavior at school and in the programs. Bethany challenged anyone in authority. She would scream and swear at adults. Both children got in fights regularly. They were seen by social workers and mental health professionals who encouraged the Millers to keep providing consistent routines and firm boundaries.

One afternoon in the school-age program, Braden was having a snack with friends. A staff member overheard several of the children bragging about the spicy foods they could eat. He heard Braden say, “That’s nothing. Even our baby brother has to eat hot sauce. Whenever I talk back, I have to eat a whole spoon of hot pepper…so I can handle spicy stuff better than you.” He saw Caleb quickly jump up, grab Braden by the shirt, and say, “Shut up. You are such a liar. You should be happy you even have a place to live. Don’t talk about my parents.” Braden looked completely frightened by the incident. The staff member separated the boys, and made a note of what he heard and saw. He talked to his manager about it. They decided they would monitor the situation. They both agreed with each other that Braden often told stories that didn’t seem true, but that Caleb’s behavior (and Braden’s fearful reaction) was unusual. They kept a record of the encounter and decided to try to find resources to help build a relationship between Caleb and Braden.

Not long later, Bethany confided in a staff member at the school-age program. Bethany had grown to trust and look up to the staff member, Sasha. Bethany told Sasha about the beatings and about “obedience tests” that she was forced to perform. She said the Miller’s oldest biological son, Jonah (age 15), helped his parents teach the children how to obey. He began giving Bethany “obedience tests” where he would ask her to do a variety of tasks. If she did not comply, he would tell his parents that she had been “disobedient.” She said it was usually ok, but last night he made her lay underneath him in her bed. She was scared to go home. She begged Sasha never to tell anyone. Sasha said she could not make that promise and that she wanted Bethany and her brother to be safe. She talked to her manager, who also remembered the recent incident with Braden, and made a report to Family Advocacy Programs (FAP), Child Protective Services (CSP), and law enforcement about the conversation.

An investigation began shortly after the report was made. The Millers lost custody of all 5 of their children. Ultimately, Derrik and Melinda were arrested and charged with endangerment, assault, and conspiracy. They face a maximum of 10 years in prison if convicted.

The Miller’s Story seems like an obvious example of child abuse and neglect. In reality, though, it was hard to tell just how much danger the children were in.