Use the following charts as resources for yourself and staff members regarding social-emotional development.
Social Emotional Development for Infants
CDCs Developmental Milestones. (2021). Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.
2 months
- Smiles at people when they talk or smile
- Can briefly calm self (may bring hands to mouth and suck on hand)
- Looks at your face
- Calms down when spoken to or picked up
- Cries when hungry, wet, tired, or wants to be held
4 months
- Smiles on own to get your attention
- Likes to play with people and might cry when playing stops
- Imitates some movements and facial expressions, like smiling or frowning
- Looks at you, moves, or makes sounds to get or keep your attention
- Becomes more expressive and communicative with face and body
6 months
- Knows familiar people
- Likes to play with others, especially parents
- Responds to other peoples emotions and often seems happy
- Likes to look at self in a mirror
- Laughs
9 months
- Is shy, clingy, or fearful of strangers
- May be clingy with familiar adults
- Shows several facial expressions like happy, sad, angry, surprised
- Looks when you call their name
- Reacts when you leave (looks, reaches for you, or cries)
- Smiles or laughs when you play peek-a-boo
1 year
- May be shy or nervous with strangers
- Cries when mom or dad leaves
- Shows preferences for certain people and things
- Shows fear in some situations
- Repeats sounds or actions to get attention
- Puts out arm or leg to help with dressing
- Feeds self with hands and fingers
- Plays games such as peek-a-boo and pat-a-cake
15 months
- Copies other children while playing
- Shows you an object they like
- Claps when excited
- Hugs a stuffed toy or doll
- Shows you affection (hugs, kisses, cuddles)
Social Emotional Development for Toddlers
CDCs Developmental Milestones. (2021). Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.
18 months
- May cling to caregivers in new situations
- Points to show others something interesting
- Explores alone but with parent close by
- Puts hands out for you to wash them
- Looks at a few pages in a book with you
- Helps you dress them by pushing arm through sleeve or lifting a foot
2 years
- Shows defiant behavior (doing what told not to do)
- Imitates others, especially adults and older children
- Gets excited when with other children
- Shows more and more independence
- Plays mainly beside other children, but is beginning to include other children, such as in chase games
- Engages in simple pretend play (feeding a doll, rocking a stuffed animal)
- Notices when others are hut or upset
- Looks at your face to see how to react in new situations
- May demonstrate episodes of separation anxiety
- Drinks from a lidless cup with little spilling
- Feeds self using utensils with some spilling
30 months
- Plays next to other children and sometimes with them
- Shows you what they can do by saying Look at me!
- Follows simple routines when told
- Puts on a jacket, coat, or shirt by self
Social Emotional Development for Preschoolers
CDCs Developmental Milestones. (2021). Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.
By 3 years
- Plays make-believe with dolls, animals, and people
- Copies adults and friends
- Notices other children and joins them in play
- Shows affection for friends without prompting
- Shows concern for crying friend
- Shows a wide range of emotions
- Calms down within 10 minutes after you leave
- May get upset with major changes in routine
By 4 years
- Interested in new experiences
- Pretends to be something else during play (teacher, dog, superhero)
- Make-believe play is more creative and complex
- Dresses and undresses self
- Would rather play with other children than by themself
- Can name two or more friends
- Comforts others who are hurt or sad
- Cooperates with other children
- Often cant tell whats real and whats make-believe
- Talks about what they like and what they are interested in
- Likes to be a helper
- Changes behavior based on where they are
- Avoids danger, like not jumping from tall heights on the playground
By 5 years
- Wants to please friends
- Wants to be like friends
- Follows rules when playing games with others
- Takes turns when playing games with other children
- Likes to sing, dance, and act
- Is aware of gender
- Can tell whats real and whats make-believe
- Shows more independence
- Does simple chores at home
- Can tell you their first and last name and age
Social Emotional Development for School-Age Children
From Leyden, R., & Shale, E. (2012). What's happening? Ages, Stages and Milestones in What Teachers Need to Know about Social and Emotional Development. Camberwell, Victoria: ACER Press.
Between the ages of 5 and 7, school-agers
- Develop greater empathy
- Establish and maintain positive relationships and friendships
- Start developing a sense of morality
- Control impulsive behavior
- Identify and manage emotions
- Form a positive self-concept and self-esteem (identity formation has begun)
- Become resilient
- Begin to function more independently (from looking after person possessions to making decision without needing constant support).
- Form opinions about moral values right and wrong
- Be able to express an opinion and negotiate
- Develop greater empathy
- Begin understanding different viewpoints
- Start making more sense of "who I am" (Who am I like? Who likes me?)
- Develop a sense of family history (identity)
- Grapple with questions about death
- Accept that parents are not all powerful
Between the ages of 8 and 9, school-agers
- Fit in and be accepted by peers (preoccupied with comparisons do I fit in?)
- Have a best friend
- Strengthen cooperative skills
- Adjust to a sexually developing body and handle the agonies of feeling awkward and self-conscious (What will I look like? Do I look normal?)
- Continue refining a sense of self (fluid and constantly changing)
- Work out values and beliefs often passionately adopt an ethical stance
- Establish independence and individuality (intensely private, wanting alone time, displays of noncompliance at school and home)
Between the ages of 10 and 11, school-agers
- Behave appropriately in a variety of social situations
- Refine communication skills
- Resolve interpersonal conflicts understand the difference between passive, assertive, and aggressive responses
- Become more independent and responsible for actions
- Value and respect rules and authority
- Know how to act appropriately and safely in online social world
- Manage emotional changes accompanying puberty (torn between needing the security of the familiar and craving the unknown)
- Develop more positive self esteem and resilience by building strengths and accepting limitations
- Acknowledge who I am through an optimistic lens
By the age of 12 and beyond, school-agers
- Adjust to a bigger social world with greater expectations and demands
- Overcome the awkward and clumsy stage
- Find acceptance within a peer group
- Become more self-assured and able to say No!
- Move further away from family and closer to friends for support
- Handle issues and growing concerns about sexuality and relationships
- Manage confusing and unexpected feelings, such as anger and rebellion
- Move toward self-acceptance
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